What a change of pace to go from waking up at 4 in the morning every weekday to waking up on a Thursday next to a girl who has to wake up earlier than I do.. (it's been a while!). I remember when Jagger first asked me about becoming producer of his morning show. I was more than excited, and knew I could do more than what the job needed. The funny thing is, I think I was the only one. I remember the month leading up to it people had a different look in their eye when they would look at me, It was doubt. I'm no stranger to that look.

When I was 18 I was delivering pizza fresh out of high school. Since I was 7 I wanted nothing but to get into radio. My Dad always told me that I needed to have a "backup plan". Guess that's a Dad's role! I had no idea how I was going to accomplish what I wanted to do, but I knew that if I made sure to keep it the only thing that mattered to me, everything would work itself out. I remember it like it was yesterday, I got stiffed on a tip and went back to the car furious. I was listening to 105.3 FM TALK (that's what it was called at the time), and a new show was on the air called "The Liz Wilde Show". It was a mess, and hard to listen to at times, because they had taken no time to build the characters on the show into people you cared about, and because of it I was ready to tune out. Then something kept me for just a second longer. This guy with a deep Boston accent started asking for people interested in getting into radio to apply for an internship. I called immediately. "What do I have to do to become an intern?" The same guy was explaining that I would have to be in school and able to get credit for it. I was devastated. I was living on my own and rent was due. Even if I WANTED to get into classes I couldn't afford the tuition. He asked if I was a student. I said I was, and ready to come in the next day if necessary. My meeting was set for the very next day at 6pm. I had less than 24 hours to become a student. I went to sign up for the classes got all the paperwork and everything necessary and once I had it all... Dropped the classes to get my money back so I could pay rent. Went to the station and called the producer of The Liz Wilde Show and let him know I was ready to go. We walked in and he started to give me a quick tour of the building as he made sure I had everything I needed. I was overwhelmed just by being in the building but tried to keep my cool. We finally went back to his office where we would have to sign everything and make it "official". That was when it happened. "You know you have to have thick skin in this business, right?" Sam had just dropped the line I will forever remember him for.

Working on The Liz Wilde Show I learned alot. I was a sponge. Within weeks I could tell when a bit was working, and other times I would be in the producer's booth looking at the speakers thinking.. "Surely, I'm the only one listening to this mess!" I didn't really care though. While I wasn't getting paid I could say I was in radio, and that's all that really mattered. The show was so unorganized and within months the co-host and I had become friends, and started drinking during the show nightly. It had become more a party than it was a job and while I'd like to say the show was better for it, I can't. It was getting even worse (if that was possible). Needless to say, when the new Program Director came in named Gavin Spittle the clock was ticking. The show was canceled before I knew it and I was back at home wondering how I was going to get back in. The kicker? I had quit my job to focus on interning. (Who does that!?!) So, now I'm unemployed, without a show, and at home wondering what the hell happened. Then I got a call.

Sam had been asked to stay at the station to be in promotions, and he was trying to get me a gig. Again, I showed up the next day for the interview and everyone there was dressed nicely and looked a million times more qualified than me hungover in my ripped up jeans. I felt like a moron leaving there. "I should have tried to dress up", is all I could keep thinking for the next couple days till I got the call I honestly didn't even see coming. I was hired. This radio thing might just work out! I spend the next couple years doing different events for the station as it went through the changes from "105.3 FM Talk" to "105.3 The Talk that Rocks", and eventually to "Live 105.3". It became a home to me. I didn't know anything else. I spent just as much time in that building as I did my apartment and only wanted to spend more. I eventually got an offer to become full-time and work the front desk and give out prizes. Not the most fun gig, but at the time I needed the money. $600 bucks a month wasn't cutting it obviously! I was there for about a year before another thing happened that I will always remember. I was told that the new morning guy was coming in to talk with our Program Director. To be honest, I had been sneaking shots under my desk when I was told so I really wasn't paying too much attention. As I went to grab the bottle out from under the desk someone with a familiar voice asked for Gavin. I was flustered. Not only because I thought he had seen what I was reaching for (what a first impression), but also because I realized that it was Jagger. I had listened to him since I was 12 on Lovephones and really couldn't get a word out of my mouth that made sense, so I just called Gavin and awkwardly stared at the monitor till Gavin came to bring him around. The show started soon after, and it was light years better than the types of torture CBS was feeding to the station in Howard Stern's absence. It was fun, exciting, and edgy. It was perfect!

Almost a year had gone by, and (being me) I was getting into alot of crazy stuff over the weekends and taping it up to throw on YouTube. We we're shooting stuff in San Antonio and Austin. Most of which was just drunken videos and videos of me trying out halfway legal drugs to see what would happen. I didn't really have any direction, but I was ok with that. Nothing new. Then I heard about a rally that was going on in Irving to protest ICE illegally deporting people. For some reason I must have just wanted to be uncomfortable that day because I decided we should go  and wear sombreros and ridiculous mustaches. I would be called "El Mustachio" and interview people involved in the protest. Little did I know that it would get as confrontational as it did but it got the attention of Jagger who apparently saw this as talent. Gotta love him for that!

I started in January of 2008, and nervous doesn't begin to explain the feeling I had. People had been looking at me for the last month like I had no idea what I was getting into, and that (most of all) I didn't deserve it. I was on a mission to prove them wrong and (for the most part) I think I did. Jagger wasn't even sure that I'd be able to keep the schedule because of my personality, but I was so grateful that if I had to get up at 2am I would. Another thing that made it an awkward transition was that Sam (who was a MILLION times more qualified to be a producer) didn't get the offer. That made me even feel like I didn't deserve it. Again though, Sam stepped up and not only supported me, but helped me figure things out on my first couple weeks. The next year was easily the single most exciting year of my life. I was producing a show in a "Top 5 Market", and the numbers were growing. I really thought for the first time that I was where I was supposed to be. Later that year I learned an invaluable lesson in radio.

December 8th, 2008. It was my birthday and I had plans to immediately after the show go on a daytime barhopping trip no one would possibly ever remember. We finished the show and immediately got the news that the station was flipping formats. It was now going to go from an open "alternative talk" format to a sports format. I had listened to the station (and now worked at it) for over 7 years. It was my home and now it felt like it was gone. I was in shock all day and was getting pounded with emails and messages from people wanting an explanation. I didn't know what to say. How could I tell them everything was going to be the same if I didn't even know. I've seen alot of people leave since then and talk about this flip in a way that comes off bitter and jaded. In writing this I am trying to be careful not to do that because I'm not. I needed to learn that lesson because it taught me that working for a big radio company like CBS, or Clearchannel wont allow me to do what I ultimately want to do. My ideal show is one where the audience really knows me, and the people on the show. A show that has no boundaries personally or professionally. A show that no one has the power to flip the switch on only to leave the audience wondering what happened to their friends. I left CBS yesterday, and over the past couple weeks since I put in my notice saying that instead of the sure paycheck and stable job I would be focusing on Really Bad Radio, people have been looking at me with a different look in their eye. Again, it's doubt, and I'm no stranger to that look.